Survivor after survivor that I speak or work with spend so much of their initial healing trying to understand what they did wrong to have 'caused' their rape or sexual assault. If you are a survivor and you're trying to figure out what you did wrong, or what you did to have contributed, even partially, to the assault or abuse you've experienced, this is for you---it wasn't you. It was never you. It was never anything you did or what you wore. If the person who committed this act hadn't have been there, would the same have happened? No. Because it is the perpetrator who takes fault, not the victim/survivor.